Did your spouse snap at you for something frequently?
Every spouse does!
My spouse does, particularly when I am lazying around without shaving.
Anil Kapoor may look great in two days of unshaven stubble. And Indian politicians on the posters. But my wife expects always a clean look!
Often a point of contention between us!
I wanted to eliminate this occasional flash-point between us.
One great way to do is to establish a daily habit.
If you have tried to juggle with establishing any new habit like walk, exercise, yoga, quit smoking, or snacking. You know, how difficult it is.
So, I picked up this challenge and set-up this habit in flat five days.
Yes, you read it correctly.
Now its almost a month that I haven’t missed it. If I can do it, anyone can do it.
And that too in flat five days.
As some experts tells you that new habit takes 21 days or 60 days is not exactly a correct.
There is work-around, developed by a B J Fogg, Stanford behavior scholar, tried and tested by thousands. I too successfully tried it.
You don’t need high level of motivation, will-power, or/and elaborate system.
Here is a simple 3 step hack to establish any habit.
1. First find a trigger or anchor point in your day. This anchor is a already established routine or habit in your day. Something that you never miss. For example bath, breakfast, lunch, or dinner. You rarely miss that. I picked up “brushing the teeth” – first thing that I do every morning and I never miss it. This is prompt for your behavior.
2. Then plant a behavior after this trigger. If the habit that you wish to establish is bigger like doing Yoga, or quit smoking, or start cooking or running marathon. Then you have to scale down the habit. You need to make it tiny. For for Marathon running, you can start with running 100 meters. For doing Yoga, you can start with just one stretching exercise. My habit of “Shaving” itself was small. So I just started with it. I planted my tiny behavior after the anchor.
3. Once you do it for the first time, celebrate it. Yes, you read it correct – celebrate it. This can be as simple as celebrating with a smile, patting your own back, or singing a song. This is very important. When we celebrate, our brain releases neurotransmitters. This brain chemical tells your body what-ever you did (tiny habit) was good – go and repeat it. And voila – your habit is established.
BJ Fogg, calls it – a recipe of habit formation.
After I brush my teeth, I will shave and will celebrate.
Here is the graphic..
|[Image: “From book Tiny – Habits of BJ Fogg”]|
It looks easy and simple. But there is huge science and lot of research in it. You want to know more, go and read his book “Tiny Habits”
In Fact BJ Fogg runs a free (no strings attached) 5 day online program for establishing habits. You can try it at this link. It takes just few minutes per day.
I am so elated with the success of this and few more habits that I have set-up. Now I am ready to take on the bigger habits those are flash-points with my wife. One is tidying-up and Two – learn cooking.
So what habit you wish to start with!
[Image Source: By Andrew Dyer – https://www.flickr.com/photos/andrewdyer/350938953/, CC BY-SA 2.0, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=1554835 ]